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Old 17-09-2012, 05:15 PM   #1
woofercooker
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Default Please help me make sense of my life

Hello everybody

This is my 1st post here and i would like to share my story with you all

A few years ago i had a terrifying experience as a result of smoking a drug.I can not really explain what happened to me but it was a terrifying and humbling experience that was extremely emotional and at times i felt pure love and extacy tears of joy but then straight down to rock bottom and tears sadness,it was an emotional roller coaster and at the time the only thing i could put it down to was GOD was doing something to me.

Before this i was never religious or spiritual, never brought up in a religious or spiritual background etc.

I hit rock bottom after this experience and thought i had gone insane and my life would never be the same again .I suffered sever depression and anxiety, i could not leave the house i really was at rock bottom.

Over time i began to pick up and get my self together, although this was an extremely slow process, i have now reached a stage that i never thought i would have come to which is a point where im thinking very positive.

After the experience all i could think about was what on earth happened to me, it was so profound i thought god was punishing me in some way but i kept telling my self it was just a bad trip from the drug.

Anyhow i started looking into weird stuff on the internet about religion and spiritual stuff.As this was something i had never done before i found it hard to take it seriously and try to make sense of it.At 1st it really freaked me out just looking into stuff like this .One thing that always stuck with my was the fact that i did't like the idea of a god who punishes people burns them in hell etc especialy people who in my eyes are good.One peson that came to mind was my grandmother who is i think the nicest person i have ever met the thought of god sending her to hell because she didn't follow the bible just made me think you know what even if the bible is true i don't agree with it if that's the case and can't worship any god that would do such a thing!

This started me of asking questions after questions racking my brain to try and find answers. i looked briefly into all kinds of religions and still found things i could not accept.

I did however find some things that did resonated with my heart in various religions, little things like, treat others how you would want to be treated, to me this is not a question of belief this is simply a TRUTH, and it was these things that resonated as pure truth within me that i have been looking for for the past few years and i have found many and have become to enjoy trying to live by them and noticed how living by them effects your life with such clarity.

I am now at the point where over tha last year i seem to be experiencing very profound synchronicities, that somehow tell me that EVERYTHING is connected together and all our actions effect not only us but other people.

one recent thing that has been profound is the saying "you have to love your self before you can lover others"

What i am seeing is that simply be learning to love your self you AUTOMATICALLY love others without trying,

i have had some really strange and profound synchronicities over that couple of months that have become hard to doubt them as just coincidence, but i still have that very small doubt at the back of my mind but at the same time i can't stop learning and following my heart. i feel like i have made the biggest progress in the last few months to the point of what i would call enlightenment, im getting the feeling that as long as i truly follow my heart which is pure love then everything else will automatically fall into place which sounds crazy but for some strange reason it seems to be quite clear only i still have a small doubt.

Its hard to believe i have reached such a stage and state in life i never thought i would ever feel and perceive things like i do, i haven't told anybody else in case they think im crazy including my family but i thought i was about time i tried to find others and i guess the universe brought me to your forum.
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Old 17-09-2012, 05:57 PM   #2
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The word god has been used so much in manipulation, that trying to find this thing outside becomes impossible.
A man in the clouds with a grey beard, a woman, both, you have to read this book to be able to reach this god, you have to bend one knee, you have to go down on two knees, you have to do it on any number of days of the week to find this god, you have to wear funny hats, you have to do this ritual, and countless other things that are outside of you.

We live in duality, where the mind runs most people, we think that is us, the ego.

We are a human and a being, we know what a human is, what is being, being is just to be, which is quite difficult when you have a running commentary blasting all day in your head, we cannot find this joy of being, the joy that has no opposite, for the constant chatter in our mind.

To be able to find this joy, which is the undescribable, the end of suffering as the Budda only points to it, as it cannot be named. Oneness with all that is, accepting what is, it cannot be anything other than what it is, there is another man who says, it cannot be changed on the movie screen, its a done deal.

This is the peace of god, which is available to all beings.

It is to be found inside, not out.

This is what I have found on my travels and is only my opinion on what you found out and experienced, maybe I am wrong and I am always prepared to be so too.

I know so little, but yet somehow I know everything.

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Old 17-09-2012, 08:53 PM   #3
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This theory may be true or not but it will help you in a un-natural way....


Quote:
"For those who want the Cliff Notes version, here's a quick overview:
1. This World is a Holographic Program.
2. Programs cannot exist without a Programmer.
3. We ourselves know deep inside that we are not programs.
4. We who are not programs are trapped in a program.
5. This is against our will.
6. We must and can fight back against it.


Greetings, fellow prisoners. As many of you already know, scientists are pointing out that this world on which we live is not real; but is, in fact, a Hologram. The above video is simply a single explanatory example of this fact out of the multitude of evidence we have of this truth.

Ask yourself a question - how can something like an immense holographic program be created without a programmer?
The answer is simple - it can't. There must be a creator for there to be a creation. HOWEVER, I am not some bible-thumping religious maniac trying to disprove evolution.
Far from it - this hologram has evolved in complexity and realism over time.

Now, ask yourself another question: Since this world in which we live in is a holographic program, and yet something deep inside of us says that we ourselves are not programs - what does that make this hologram?

I'll tell you: A Prison. That's right, a prison. A prison for your mind - a veritable Matrix. We are trapped here in this matrix without our consent and against our will.

Who did this to us, you ask? Some call them the Archons, others say it is God or Satan, still others call them the Annunaki. What you call the Programmers does not matter at the moment - the only thing that matters is that they have imprisoned YOU.

There are those of us who have glimpsed the real world outside of this hologram - I must confess, it's not a pleasant sight. What the outside looks like is a cold, wet version of Hell - from what we've seen, it's a dark underground prison where everyone is kept in stasis (so that they do not age). Every prisoner has a headset, a "holoband" if you will, with multiple wires feeding directly into their brain - this is what keeps your mind in the hologram.

Death here has no effect on the soul or on one's Karma, the machine simply draws you into the light and regurgitates you into a new holobody. This is not reincarnation, but rather holoreincarnation - a perverse twisting mockery of the real.

But not all hope is lost - some of us are actively fighting back to destroy the machine and shut down the holographic prison. We have already struck a major blow to it, and will continue doing so until we are free. It will not be long now - before the year's end - until the machine is shut down.

If you wish to help us in this endeavor, you must first understand that this world is NOT real. There are three steps to understanding the truth.
First: Believe it in your Heart, then Believe it in your Mind.
Secondly: Realize it in your Heart, then Realize it in your Mind.
Finally: Know it in your Heart, then Know it in your Mind.

Once you embrace the truth that the world around you does not truly exist, you will be ready to join the fight.
How, you ask? Simple. Create as much chaos as possible.

For those among you who are psychic and/or spiritual (LightWorker and DarkWorker alike - An unlikely alliance has been formed for the sake of Freedom), send as much energy towards unbalancing the system: be it through massive earthquakes, bigger solar flares, climate upheaval, meteorite barrages, etc... (PS - Eros is coming, good opportunity here) Don't worry about bad karma - you are not harming anyone, but are instead helping them.

For those who aren't spiritually minded - The more chaos that you can cause through anarchy, the better. Don't play along with the system: Don't go to work, or go to school, or obey the laws. Reject the system and what it expects you to do. This will help as well.

Hold on to hope and help if you can - we will all soon be free.

We are awake.
The matrix is shutting down.
We will soon be free."
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Old 17-09-2012, 10:54 PM   #4
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What was the spiritual experience? Was it an unexplained urge to treat others as you would have them treat you or something else that brought you to that understanding?
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Old 17-09-2012, 11:28 PM   #5
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It sounds like the drug acted as a catalyst to wake you up to what is going on inside you and with other people too. It is an emotional roller coaster but it's one you have to go with and ride if you want to come out smiling. It seems to have guided you to the truth and it's good to have you on board
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Old 18-09-2012, 11:48 AM   #6
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The best way that i can describe the experience is that i felt the presence of something greater and far more powerful than me.something the ego could not ignore or even begin to argue with, it was truly the ultimate death of the ego,ultimate fear of god/the universe/the divine etc

Another strange thing is that, it started with a very intense strange feeling in my belly kind of like butterflys but without the sickness i remember rocking back and fowrad and for some reason i was chanting over and over " i got soul" i got soul" i got souuuuuull"

i became extremely conscious about all my wrong doing,not that i was a particularly bad person before, i have always been the nice guy.

Afterwards i remember thinking man that really messed me up look at all these people living their normal lives with no idea what i just experienced i wished i could just be normal again and thought how much more i would appreciated normal life again and how others dont appreciate normal life.

since this has all happened my life has become so much better, i have achieved things i never thought i ever would in a short space of time. and the few set backs i have had, i can look out and kind of say they where actually needed to get me back on track.

now just very recently iv had a strange intuition that everything is connected, iv always found that by seeking knowledge i slowly get a better understanding but iv come to a point where i seem to be stuck for the 1st time in a long time, don't know what to do or where im going not necessarily in a bad way im finding it hard to deal with uncertainty. im getting the feeling that its now time to sit back and let the universes do its thing. but i still have that small doubt and have the urge to take control my self. im confused
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Old 18-09-2012, 12:38 PM   #7
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Hi woofercooker

Thanks for sharing this and keep posting. When I first started going down the spiritual path (so to speak) I read a mountain of books and one of the first ones I read was by Timothy Freke and to this day his books still resonate with me deeply and you might find them useful too

irvking I enjoyed reading your post too and you mention a link to a video but I can't seem to find it, but would like to see it. I also agree with what you said:

"Don't go to work, or go to school, or obey the laws. Reject the system and what it expects you to do".

The thing (which I don't understand) is how would we eat, have money to live etc, etc if we didn't go to work/obey the laws.... I am relatively new to all this spiritual stuff and oneness etc, but very eager to learn more, so please bear with me
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Old 18-09-2012, 01:56 PM   #8
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Hi woofercooker

Thanks for sharing this and keep posting. When I first started going down the spiritual path (so to speak) I read a mountain of books and one of the first ones I read was by Timothy Freke and to this day his books still resonate with me deeply and you might find them useful too

irvking I enjoyed reading your post too and you mention a link to a video but I can't seem to find it, but would like to see it. I also agree with what you said:

"Don't go to work, or go to school, or obey the laws. Reject the system and what it expects you to do".

The thing (which I don't understand) is how would we eat, have money to live etc, etc if we didn't go to work/obey the laws.... I am relatively new to all this spiritual stuff and oneness etc, but very eager to learn more, so please bear with me
Hello there!


It is a theory that I had found in which somewhere in those lines the truth is near close.....

Unknown who wrote it but definately a eye-opener theory for the people!


Everybody,


.........Always transcend and protect yourself!
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Old 18-09-2012, 02:33 PM   #9
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Hi woofercooker,you'll be okay here x
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Old 18-09-2012, 03:42 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by woofercooker View Post
now just very recently iv had a strange intuition that everything is connected, iv always found that by seeking knowledge i slowly get a better understanding but iv come to a point where i seem to be stuck for the 1st time in a long time, don't know what to do or where im going not necessarily in a bad way im finding it hard to deal with uncertainty. im getting the feeling that its now time to sit back and let the universes do its thing. but i still have that small doubt and have the urge to take control my self. im confused
You've come a very long way in a very short space of time. When you get stuck I feel it's because you've come as far as you can for now but you've hit a brick wall and you must stop and be quiet and listen.
The doubt is fear...something is beginning to bubble up to the surface of your conscious awareness...just allow it to. Keep a diary if it helps you to feel more grounded. Try and get close to nature. it may take some time so be patient.
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Old 30-09-2012, 01:04 PM   #11
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i had a similar experience in 2007.i was 18yrs old. i had just dropped out of college after i experimented with drugs. i was majoring Natural sciences but mostly captivated by eastern texts. i also read some carl jung. in 2007 one night something came over me and i started hearing voices in my head giving me some serious truths about reality.. sometimes i heard music and saw rainbows in the living room. the nickelodeon cartoon prometheus and bob came into my head over and over again then i saw the vision of a stellar bloodline cutting across my DNA.. then i also saw a system of mind loading were we upload our consciousness into a virtual world and interact with others. everyone thought i was nuts by my ranting so i stopped ranting. in hospital i was diagnosed with severe depression but i kept seeing human nurses with reptile like faces... it gets more crazy.. i saw a visions of princess diana's death and i saw the british crown.. still cant figure out y. it was like information overload.. then i remember seeing a star ship war with aliens invading earth sometime after 2012..something big was going on, i dont know what....glad to share.
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Old 30-09-2012, 02:57 PM   #12
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i had a similar experience in 2007.i was 18yrs old. I had just dropped out of college after i experimented with drugs. I was majoring natural sciences but mostly captivated by eastern texts. I also read some carl jung. In 2007 one night something came over me and i started hearing voices in my head giving me some serious truths about reality.. Sometimes i heard music and saw rainbows in the living room. The nickelodeon cartoon prometheus and bob came into my head over and over again then i saw the vision of a stellar bloodline cutting across my dna.. Then i also saw a system of mind loading were we upload our consciousness into a virtual world and interact with others. Everyone thought i was nuts by my ranting so i stopped ranting. In hospital i was diagnosed with severe depression but i kept seeing human nurses with reptile like faces... It gets more crazy.. I saw a visions of princess diana's death and i saw the british crown.. Still cant figure out y. It was like information overload.. Then i remember seeing a star ship war with aliens invading earth sometime after 2012..something big was going on, i dont know what....glad to share.
Hi and welcome to the DIF!

Wow! That's very intense stuff! Thanks for sharing.
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Old 01-10-2012, 10:56 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by woofercooker View Post
Hello everybody

This is my 1st post here and i would like to share my story with you all

A few years ago i had a terrifying experience as a result of smoking a drug.I can not really explain what happened to me but it was a terrifying and humbling experience that was extremely emotional and at times i felt pure love and extacy tears of joy but then straight down to rock bottom and tears sadness,it was an emotional roller coaster and at the time the only thing i could put it down to was GOD was doing something to me.

Before this i was never religious or spiritual, never brought up in a religious or spiritual background etc.

I hit rock bottom after this experience and thought i had gone insane and my life would never be the same again .I suffered sever depression and anxiety, i could not leave the house i really was at rock bottom.

Over time i began to pick up and get my self together, although this was an extremely slow process, i have now reached a stage that i never thought i would have come to which is a point where im thinking very positive.

After the experience all i could think about was what on earth happened to me, it was so profound i thought god was punishing me in some way but i kept telling my self it was just a bad trip from the drug.

Anyhow i started looking into weird stuff on the internet about religion and spiritual stuff.As this was something i had never done before i found it hard to take it seriously and try to make sense of it.At 1st it really freaked me out just looking into stuff like this .One thing that always stuck with my was the fact that i did't like the idea of a god who punishes people burns them in hell etc especialy people who in my eyes are good.One peson that came to mind was my grandmother who is i think the nicest person i have ever met the thought of god sending her to hell because she didn't follow the bible just made me think you know what even if the bible is true i don't agree with it if that's the case and can't worship any god that would do such a thing!

This started me of asking questions after questions racking my brain to try and find answers. i looked briefly into all kinds of religions and still found things i could not accept.

I did however find some things that did resonated with my heart in various religions, little things like, treat others how you would want to be treated, to me this is not a question of belief this is simply a TRUTH, and it was these things that resonated as pure truth within me that i have been looking for for the past few years and i have found many and have become to enjoy trying to live by them and noticed how living by them effects your life with such clarity.

I am now at the point where over tha last year i seem to be experiencing very profound synchronicities, that somehow tell me that EVERYTHING is connected together and all our actions effect not only us but other people.

one recent thing that has been profound is the saying "you have to love your self before you can lover others"

What i am seeing is that simply be learning to love your self you AUTOMATICALLY love others without trying,

i have had some really strange and profound synchronicities over that couple of months that have become hard to doubt them as just coincidence, but i still have that very small doubt at the back of my mind but at the same time i can't stop learning and following my heart. i feel like i have made the biggest progress in the last few months to the point of what i would call enlightenment, im getting the feeling that as long as i truly follow my heart which is pure love then everything else will automatically fall into place which sounds crazy but for some strange reason it seems to be quite clear only i still have a small doubt.

Its hard to believe i have reached such a stage and state in life i never thought i would ever feel and perceive things like i do, i haven't told anybody else in case they think im crazy including my family but i thought i was about time i tried to find others and i guess the universe brought me to your forum.
welcome to the real world

what you experienced was part of the matrix reality. the drugs opened up a "section" of your consciousness to give you a perspective of what was "out there". You experienced one of the many realities that this "matrix reality" conjurs up according to your experience of life. Your past life energies are also stored up in your consciousness.

you have done well to concentrate on messages like treat others well, follow your heart ect.

i would suggest you look into the principles of buddhism and taoism. Not to necessarily follow them, but take note of what they are saying. They are some of the purest philosophies that exist. They are extremely spiritual, and never forget your are intertwined with everything and everyone around you.

Achieve the balance of non judgement, non duality in perfect harmony with all that exists, and yourself, and you will be truly at peace.

Last edited by infinityandlove; 01-10-2012 at 11:32 PM.
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Old 02-10-2012, 01:15 AM   #14
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Hello everybody
There is so much information that it is difficult to be brief, but I'll just go by what comes to mind:

Consider the creation analogue- it is the analogue upon which everything is running. Look at anything, say, a building. The building you see began its existence as an idea in the mind of an architect. It began as a dream. The architect then makes blueprints and such, beginning the creation process. He uses materials, follows the plans, hires the labor and constructs the building. At the end of the process, the building- once finished- is finally the same as when it began as a dream/idea; only now it exists for everyone to see in a reality independant from the dream of the architect. So you have the BEGINNING (perfect-dream/idea existent only in the internal reality of the dreamer), the CREATION (imperfection through process moving toward perfection), the ENDING (perfect-dream/idea as its own reality).

This is what is happening to you, to everyone- even the entire universe. The reason you feel imperfect is because you currently are imperfect (meaning, not finished)- when you ask, "why am I this way?" it is like an unfinished building lamenting it's lack of a roof and asking, "why am I thus?" It is because you are not yet finished! You are not yet YOU; not the REAL you who you are BECOMING. You are in the process of becoming YOU- all of your "flaws" are there simply to be polished away, like the "flaw" of the roofless building who will have his roof in the time of completion.

You are in fact- along with the entire universe- moving through a LIMBO of sorts, coming out of non-existence, moving THROUGH the current dream-state, and TOWARD that which is real- much like the Velveteen Rabbit. The things that are occuring now to you- and others- even the universe- are programmed into this shared dream-state we call "the real world" to effectuate the perfection (that is to say, completion) of the creation; sort of like you are beginning to hear the music down in the dream-state, to allow you to recognize what is beginning to transpire. As the creation begins to "wake up" it will be preceeded by much anxiety- in the same way a baby about to be born enters a state of anxiety caused by lack of understanding at what is occuring.

The world we experience in our "waking hours" is exactly the same as the world we experience in our dreams- the only difference is that in this state we are sharing the dream-state with everyone else; and this dream-state will conform always to "majority rules" so if most people think humans cannot fly- then there will be no flying in this dream-state! However, much like you MUST wake from the solitary dream-state of your own privacy, so we MUST also wake from the shared dream-state and into the reality to come. When all things will be perfected, and the REAL you will be revealed.

If you've read the Velveteen Rabbit- then this existence of ours is being effectuated in the same way; while you are not real, it is God that is setting his affection on you thereby CAUSING you to begin to attain your own individual reality through His/Her feelings toward you. Much like the boy's influence on the Velveteen Rabbit: or much as the influence your favorite movie character has an actual emotional influence on you: you in fact cause that "object" to begin to attain a "more real than not" quality in that you are being affected by this character.

Another way to look at it is through a kind of Flatland analogy: think of television characters in their dream world that we, the "gods" put them in; we create their worlds, give them their lines, and we "watch" their story from a kind-of "fourth dimensional" vantage point. So, we are like the "gods" and these fictional movie characters are the "mankind"- okay take that analogy and shunt it over so that we move the movie-people into our reality, and we move into the "higher" corresponding reality. This is an analogue, of course.

This all actually comes from the bible, which is true: (un?)fortunately, though the bible is true, the Christians are in fact completely wrong. They are misrepresenting the bible with traditions that they are taught by, usually the parents. So you have people believing that the bible says that God will put people into an eternal burning nightmare when in fact that isn't even remotely close to what the bible is actually saying: it is simply a misunderstanding of the analogues through which God is communicating to us in order to tell us what is happening to us in this reality, and telling us not to be afraid of what is coming- because it is simply birth.

For instance look:

God uses the physical, visible things as analogues of the spiritual, invisible things- so FIRE, for instance. "Everlasting fire" is an analogue of TRUTH (specifically LOVE); the bible is telling you through the fire analogue that, as you progress toward understanding, then confusion will be getting burned up by the fire. It is saying that, all of the things that are not desired- hatred, greed, pride, ignorance- these things must perish in the fire as you are perfected; simply because these things have no place in the REAL you.

So what you are really being told in the bible is that, yes, people and worlds will burn in the fires: but this is not an eternal thing, and it is not a literal, physical fire: it is simply saying that people's paradigms that are built on misunderstandings and nonsense will be burned up by the revealed information; this will cause some grief for a great number of people- especially Christians: because let's face it, to some people, they would rather face an eternity in physical fire than to be proven wrong for an instant.

This is basically the problem: confusion- and it must be burned up in the fires of understanding; you see?

Heb 12:29 For our God is a consuming fire.
Lu 12:49 I am come to send fire on the earth; and what will I, if it be already kindled?
Jer 5:14 Wherefore thus saith the LORD God of hosts, Because ye speak this word, behold, I will make my words in thy mouth fire, and this people wood, and it shall devour them.
Joh 17:17 Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.

You see how "fire" is being analogued with "truth"? So, you see how one little misunderstanding of analogues is causing a HUGE misrepresenation? This is basically what is going on with the bible- the Christians are mostly the culrits of actually being the direct cause of confusion. This isn't to mean that they are bad people or anything- this misinterpretation of data issue is prevelent EVERYWHERE- science itself is just as riddled with it as religion. This is just happening as a natural result of becoming real- we must pass through the confusion of coming into being.

The good news is that it turns out GREAT for EVERYONE: this is why it is written:

Re 21:5 And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make ALL THINGS new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.
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