|18-10-2011, 07:52 PM||#1|
Join Date: Aug 2009
15 celebrities who may be reptilian
Be honest. If a forked tongue shot out of his mouth and caught a fly, would you really be that surprised?
Please don't tell me that Metallica recorded a horrible collaborative album with Lou Reed. Tell me that Metallica recorded a horrible collaboration with a space reptile in a Lou Reed skin mask. I like that version better.
If you told me that former Olympian Bruce Jenner was abducted by space reptiles, anally probed, murdered, and replaced with a humanoid lizard creature, it would make more sense than if you told me he just got so much plastic surgery that he just flat out resembles an aging soccer mom.
To be honest, I think the entire Royal Family are lizard people
If a lizard came down from space, and his human suit looked like Lyle Lovett, I actually think that other lizards would look at it and say "you know what? Too lizardy."
Fact: to extraterrestrial space lizards, black tar heroin and unfiltered cigarettes are like Vitamin C and Chicken Soup. Explains a lot
You know what also look a lot cuter when they're young? LIZARDS.
Can we talk about the fact that you look like a reptile?
George H. W. Bush
After running the CIA and serving as Reagan's Vice President, H.W. watched two of his sons enter lives of public service. Of course, it makes sense that some of his offspring would do well. Lizards lay literally thousands of eggs.
Parton famously quipped that it "takes a lot of money to look this cheap." It also takes a lot of money to cover up the fact that she can disjoint her lower jaw and swallow a 30-pound muskrat without chewing. (She is a lizard.)
I know what you're thinking. The tongue, right? Wrong. As it happens, one way you can tell someone is a Reptilian from beyond our solar system is by their incredible marketing skills
If you're an interstellar space creature in a human shaped meat suit, you don't need to have baby oil grind sessions with an 80-year old man to achieve success. Still, that's not the kind of thing human women enjoy. You figure it out.
Sheen outright admitted that he's a "rockstar from Mars." Is it that much of a leap to "space lizard?"
Some say it's bad plastic surgery. Some say it's good plastic surgery. Some say that underneath the skin of the legendary country/western singer Kenny Rogers, there are thousands of green, calcified, interlocking scales, which protect their alien host from the ravages of the elements. I'm just kidding. No one says it's good plastic surgery.
In a 2011 satellite radio interview, comedian Louis CK repeatedly and directly asked Rumsfeld if he could deny being a Reptilian. Rumsfeld refused.