remember
24-08-2007, 09:23 PM
Hello,
Obviously this is my first post on this forum. I would like to ask everybody on here for their opinion on my experiences. Before I begin, I want to say that I became interested in aliens (or native terrans?) because of said experiences and that I have never read a single page of David Icke's books. I'm not watching Reptilian shape-shifting videos on youtube. I have read a few interviews and excerpts on this topic (although I have to admit I usually skip most), and I have studied some of the threads in this forum. Some strike me as rather... unlikely. Others seem to be all too real. Oh yes. And please excuse my English - it's not my first language and sometimes it's not quite perfect.
You are of course free to believe me or doubt what I'm saying - most of the time I have no clue what is real and what is not either. I could, in fact, be entirely completely insane. Which is what I consider myself to be when nothing has occurred for a while. Perhaps I should add that I don't take any kind of drugs, I don't smoke and I don't drink alcohol. I drink about two cups of coffee a day - as far as mood-or-mind-enhancing substances are concerned, that is all. I have never been abused, neither mental, nor physical, nor sexual. Nobody has ever raped or beaten me. My childhood was not exactly ideal, but not that bad either. Other than that, I consider myself to be extremely lucky in life. Perhaps with one exception.
To make it short: Ever since I was about 13 years old, I have heard voiced of what I first believed to be evil spirits or demons of some sort. During the last half year or so, it turned out that these beings - even though they appear to be body-less at the moment - originally belonged to Reptilians and in some cases other alien races. The way I perceive it at the moment is that I was groomed into being... well, let's say, mate for one of these beings. These things seemed to be harmless daydreams when I was a child, but now I'm starting to realize that everything I 'imagined' served a purpose. Perhaps it would be good to mention that many of these 'fantasies' included being eaten alive, hunted or sexually assaulted. Especially the latter was very... present during most of my life.
Umm.. obviously this is not going to be as short as I intended it to be, but I see now that some explanation might be necessary. The way I understand it, I was first intended to be a thanksgiving turkey - a special piece of meat for a special occasion. It then happened that the thing I was to be served to apparently took a... liking in me. The whole story would be very long and complicated. If anybody is interested in, just tell me. I don't mind sharing it. In the end, I was being fed lies over and over again, always new and more confusing ones. Now, during the last year or so, things have changed. The voices in my head have started fighting among each other, become more trusting and most importantly: more confident. They don't believe anything can stop them anymore at this point. I am writing all of this with 'official approval'. THAT confident.
This is why, recently, I have been given more and more information about what is actually going on. Please keep in mind that I might be fantasizing - I really can't tell. It seems so real when something is going on. If there has not been anything for a week or so, I start doubting things, but they always come back. It is also entirely possible that I am still being fed lies, so please don't count on anything I say. Even though this time I believe I am being told the truth, I may be wrong. Or just plain crazy. Who knows.
Either way. Just to give you an idea of the things I hear: During the last few weeks they have been replacing presidents of Southern-American states with shapeshifters. One of their greatest bases is in Eastern Europe, in Romania, I believe. Their leader is currently without a body and is heavily thinking about whether it would be better to use a Reptilian body (more respect) or a Human body (less resistance). They are having some problems with the race called Pleiadeans, although I'm a little confused as to what these problems are exactly. Oh, yes. And they are not planning a blood-bath when they announce their presence. They are however expecting resistance and I was told to prepare myself for a period of about three months of fighting, as in 'Get food for three months and a three-day-ration and a sleeping back for your car. Oh yes, and get a car.' They want to keep much of the current structures, but become kind of an elite or ruling class. They are planning on arriving earlier than those who are aware of them expect. The good news is: no more 'natural' disasters. Those are mostly Reptilian-made instead of man-made.
Alright. I believe if you actually read all of this, you now have a pretty good idea of what I'm experiencing. Perhaps it might be important to add that I hardly see anything of them. I have absolutely no clue what they look like in flesh and blood, and I have never seen one. I have heard descriptions and seen single features, such as eyes and hands, both in 'visions' or whatever you want to call it and in dreams. It turned out that many of the dreams I had in my life, as well as many things I have written just because they came to my mind, refer to these beings. I hear several different beings, all of them belonging to a group that works together. None of them are in a physical body at the moment. When they possess one, they say, I won't be able to hear them anymore. I believe it must be kind of 'telepathic' and some actions take place on something that I can only call astral plan, even though I never, ever see anything clearly. Perhaps it would be better described as an 'energetic level'. I feel things happening to the energy that I consist of, but never to my actual body. This energy is very important. It is the reason why I was 'chosen' in the first place. I was told it is of a kind that is especially useful or appealing.
Now that I've said most things that matter, I would like to hear what you think about it. The most important thing for me, right now, is to find out whether this is real or not. My experiences sound unlike all others I have read or heard about. I have researched mental illnesses, but nothings seems to quite fit. I am honestly doubting what to believe. I went to a psychiatrist before - the only problem is that I was able to convince them I was perfectly normal, happy and healthy, even though I certainly was not at that time. I don't think a psychiatrist will be able to help me find out if something is wrong with me, because a) I'm 'instinctively' pretending to be alright and b) if I didn't pretend, the result would be 'crazy' no matter whether this is real or not. In short, I have no better idea where to turn than here. I guess it's a beginning.
If you need any other information about my experiences in order to tell fact from confusion, please just ask. I'm thankful for everybody who tries to help me clearing up my little problem.
Obviously this is my first post on this forum. I would like to ask everybody on here for their opinion on my experiences. Before I begin, I want to say that I became interested in aliens (or native terrans?) because of said experiences and that I have never read a single page of David Icke's books. I'm not watching Reptilian shape-shifting videos on youtube. I have read a few interviews and excerpts on this topic (although I have to admit I usually skip most), and I have studied some of the threads in this forum. Some strike me as rather... unlikely. Others seem to be all too real. Oh yes. And please excuse my English - it's not my first language and sometimes it's not quite perfect.
You are of course free to believe me or doubt what I'm saying - most of the time I have no clue what is real and what is not either. I could, in fact, be entirely completely insane. Which is what I consider myself to be when nothing has occurred for a while. Perhaps I should add that I don't take any kind of drugs, I don't smoke and I don't drink alcohol. I drink about two cups of coffee a day - as far as mood-or-mind-enhancing substances are concerned, that is all. I have never been abused, neither mental, nor physical, nor sexual. Nobody has ever raped or beaten me. My childhood was not exactly ideal, but not that bad either. Other than that, I consider myself to be extremely lucky in life. Perhaps with one exception.
To make it short: Ever since I was about 13 years old, I have heard voiced of what I first believed to be evil spirits or demons of some sort. During the last half year or so, it turned out that these beings - even though they appear to be body-less at the moment - originally belonged to Reptilians and in some cases other alien races. The way I perceive it at the moment is that I was groomed into being... well, let's say, mate for one of these beings. These things seemed to be harmless daydreams when I was a child, but now I'm starting to realize that everything I 'imagined' served a purpose. Perhaps it would be good to mention that many of these 'fantasies' included being eaten alive, hunted or sexually assaulted. Especially the latter was very... present during most of my life.
Umm.. obviously this is not going to be as short as I intended it to be, but I see now that some explanation might be necessary. The way I understand it, I was first intended to be a thanksgiving turkey - a special piece of meat for a special occasion. It then happened that the thing I was to be served to apparently took a... liking in me. The whole story would be very long and complicated. If anybody is interested in, just tell me. I don't mind sharing it. In the end, I was being fed lies over and over again, always new and more confusing ones. Now, during the last year or so, things have changed. The voices in my head have started fighting among each other, become more trusting and most importantly: more confident. They don't believe anything can stop them anymore at this point. I am writing all of this with 'official approval'. THAT confident.
This is why, recently, I have been given more and more information about what is actually going on. Please keep in mind that I might be fantasizing - I really can't tell. It seems so real when something is going on. If there has not been anything for a week or so, I start doubting things, but they always come back. It is also entirely possible that I am still being fed lies, so please don't count on anything I say. Even though this time I believe I am being told the truth, I may be wrong. Or just plain crazy. Who knows.
Either way. Just to give you an idea of the things I hear: During the last few weeks they have been replacing presidents of Southern-American states with shapeshifters. One of their greatest bases is in Eastern Europe, in Romania, I believe. Their leader is currently without a body and is heavily thinking about whether it would be better to use a Reptilian body (more respect) or a Human body (less resistance). They are having some problems with the race called Pleiadeans, although I'm a little confused as to what these problems are exactly. Oh, yes. And they are not planning a blood-bath when they announce their presence. They are however expecting resistance and I was told to prepare myself for a period of about three months of fighting, as in 'Get food for three months and a three-day-ration and a sleeping back for your car. Oh yes, and get a car.' They want to keep much of the current structures, but become kind of an elite or ruling class. They are planning on arriving earlier than those who are aware of them expect. The good news is: no more 'natural' disasters. Those are mostly Reptilian-made instead of man-made.
Alright. I believe if you actually read all of this, you now have a pretty good idea of what I'm experiencing. Perhaps it might be important to add that I hardly see anything of them. I have absolutely no clue what they look like in flesh and blood, and I have never seen one. I have heard descriptions and seen single features, such as eyes and hands, both in 'visions' or whatever you want to call it and in dreams. It turned out that many of the dreams I had in my life, as well as many things I have written just because they came to my mind, refer to these beings. I hear several different beings, all of them belonging to a group that works together. None of them are in a physical body at the moment. When they possess one, they say, I won't be able to hear them anymore. I believe it must be kind of 'telepathic' and some actions take place on something that I can only call astral plan, even though I never, ever see anything clearly. Perhaps it would be better described as an 'energetic level'. I feel things happening to the energy that I consist of, but never to my actual body. This energy is very important. It is the reason why I was 'chosen' in the first place. I was told it is of a kind that is especially useful or appealing.
Now that I've said most things that matter, I would like to hear what you think about it. The most important thing for me, right now, is to find out whether this is real or not. My experiences sound unlike all others I have read or heard about. I have researched mental illnesses, but nothings seems to quite fit. I am honestly doubting what to believe. I went to a psychiatrist before - the only problem is that I was able to convince them I was perfectly normal, happy and healthy, even though I certainly was not at that time. I don't think a psychiatrist will be able to help me find out if something is wrong with me, because a) I'm 'instinctively' pretending to be alright and b) if I didn't pretend, the result would be 'crazy' no matter whether this is real or not. In short, I have no better idea where to turn than here. I guess it's a beginning.
If you need any other information about my experiences in order to tell fact from confusion, please just ask. I'm thankful for everybody who tries to help me clearing up my little problem.