First step: I need to work on myself

[anoninnyc]

As a truth seeker, I must be honest with myself. I have anger issues, trouble forgiving people, trouble trusting people, and at times I am judgmental and self-righteous. I have gotten a lot better with my anger issues, in fact by leaps and bounds. But I have problems letting go of hurt. I am also materialistic, not by the standards of our out of control society, but I do worry about money, and hope to make much more. I am also scared of what people think, especially if I fully open up about the illuminati, etc. not because I am embarrassed but but because in certain situations this could harm me financially. Like with work colleagues I would NEVER bring this up, but all of my real friends know what I truly believe. Please don't flame me for this. I am looking for constructive criticism, because I look in the mirror and there and I am not sure if I like who I see.

[tru3]

As a truth seeker, I must be honest with myself. I have anger issues, trouble forgiving people, trouble trusting people, and at times I am judgmental and self-righteous. I have gotten a lot better with my anger issues, in fact by leaps and bounds. But I have problems letting go of hurt. I am also materialistic, not by the standards of our out of control society, but I do worry about money, and hope to make much more. I am also scared of what people think, especially if I fully open up about the illuminati, etc. not because I am embarrassed but but because in certain situations this could harm me financially. Like with work colleagues I would NEVER bring this up, but all of my real friends know what I truly believe. Please don't flame me for this. I am looking for constructive criticism, because I look in the mirror and there and I am not sure if I like who I see.

welcome to the human condition. you are not alone; i personally have experienced all the things you mentioned, and then some. :rolleyes:

a fearless moral inventory every once in a while never hurt anyone.

no, you'll see no flames shooting out of my arse today. :)

as for trying to convince my peergroup, i sometimes wonder if it is my reponsibility to disabuse them of their illusions. many people are so stressed by the trap that they have created, one more thing like "bush is a lizard" might send them over the edge. waking up and blind panic are not the same thing.

when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

it's been years since i read the "art of war", but one thing that stuck with me is that when the "enemy" is overwhelmingly superior in numbers and strength, a general melts his troops into the woodwork, so to speak. so i watch, witness, and forgive myself when my ego says, "you fools!".

as bobby dylan sang years ago, "everybody got to serve someone." you'll know in your heart when it's time to break free. until then, my advice is to relax and forgive yourself for being Spirit having a human experience.

[i am all i am]

As a truth seeker, I must be honest with myself. I have anger issues, trouble forgiving people, trouble trusting people, and at times I am judgmental and self-righteous. I have gotten a lot better with my anger issues, in fact by leaps and bounds. But I have problems letting go of hurt. I am also materialistic, not by the standards of our out of control society, but I do worry about money, and hope to make much more. I am also scared of what people think, especially if I fully open up about the illuminati, etc. not because I am embarrassed but but because in certain situations this could harm me financially. Like with work colleagues I would NEVER bring this up, but all of my real friends know what I truly believe. Please don't flame me for this. I am looking for constructive criticism, because I look in the mirror and there and I am not sure if I like who I see.

G'day Anoninnyc,

'The Celestine Prophecy' by James Redfield is very helpful and easy to read. It shows you the 'drama' game that everyone plays (there are four control dramas), how to connect to universal energy and takes you through it all step by step within the storyline.


With LOVE.
__________________________________

WHEN PAIRED OPPOSITES DEFINE YOUR BELIEFS, YOUR BELIEFS WILL IMPRISON YOU.

[ho1ogram]

Hmmm... what a lovely gathering of people...mind if I join you? :)


one more thing like "bush is a lizard" might send them over the edge.


Or into a fit of laughter. It could be good for them. :)


when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.


So, are you saying that when I'm ready I'll help my self? :)

anoninnyc - you aint the only one who feels like that. I just tell people this stuff when it feels right, and in the mean time I ponder why I feel uncomfortable telling them. I think it is more important for us to understand it than for us to tell others. It's all an illusion right? So, why do we need to tell every one? It is our self that needs the work, after all we have been telling each other the 'truth' since the dawn of time and look where that has got us.

Someone once said, "Everybody wants to change the world, but nobody wants to change themselves." It makes sense to me. I'm tryin' to come from that idea these days.
*yawn* ..oo, pardon me, it's past my bedtime,
nighty night...
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[i am all i am]

G'day anoninnyc,

Another thing you could do for yourself is to take a look into a martial art, chi gung, tai chi or even yoga. All of them will help you with your breathing, which is important in developing your energy and focus. The movements are also of a healing nature, so you get extra benefits.

Check out the thread that I wrote, 'NOW - The only time you can change'.

With LOVE.
____________________________________

WHEN PAIRED OPPOSITES DEFINE YOUR BELIEFS, YOUR BELIEFS WILL IMPRISON YOU.

[tru3]

Or into a fit of laughter. It could be good for them.

the surest way to beat the devil is to laugh at him. :D


Quote:
when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

So, are you saying that when I'm ready I'll help my self?

good way of putting it. until i'm willing to say, "there's gotta be a better way", usually i stay stuck.

[notaslave]

Please don't flame me for this. I am looking for constructive criticism, because I look in the mirror and there and I am not sure if I like who I see.

Keep looking in the mirror until you like who you see. As someone once said "warts and all". No-one is perfect. No matter even if they think they are, they aren't. But on balance most of us are okay and dont let anyone tell you that you aren't. Go so far as to boot them out your life I would say. (and have done)

Basically you rock :p and if others dont see it show them the door.

[anoninnyc]

thanks for your posts all. it is a difficult thing to do to really look at my faults, but i am trying to evolve.

[ho1ogram]

Hey anon.., this chick Sandra Ingerman's work might appeal to you.

It is believed that whenever we suffer an emotional or physical trauma a piece of our soul flees the body in order to survive the experience. The definition of soul that I am using is soul is our essence, life force, the part of our vitality that keeps us alive and thriving.

The types of trauma that could cause soul loss in our culture would be any kind of abuse sexual, physical, or emotional. Other causes could be an accident, being in a war, being a victim of a terrorist act, acting against our morals, being in a natural disaster (a fire, hurricane, earthquake, tornado, etc.), surgery, addictions, divorce, or death of a loved one.

Any event that causes shock could cause soul loss. And what might cause soul loss in one person might not cause soul loss in another. Shamans believe that alarm clocks can cause soul loss. I think we all know what they mean.

Shamanism: Healing of Individuals and the Planet
(http://www.sandraingerman.com/abstractonshamanism.html)

As you can see, it is easy to become fragmented, a state that many of us feel (if not the whole planet). As she states, just acting against our morals can do it, and who doesn't do that? No wonder we don't like who we see when we look in the mirror.

rastamasta posted it on the 'predators of man' thread. It is an interesting thread and her site I found to be very good. On the predators thread, adramelech's stuff about psychopathic behaviour made a lot of sense to me, especially when I tie it to Sandra's soul loss info.
Cheers
h

[anoninnyc]

thanks again. new twist to this though, i am pregnant. so now i really have to work on myself so that i dont mess up an innocent baby. i will try my best to let go of all anger and negative emotions as i imagine they could negatively impact the baby growing inside of me. this is totally unexpected but i am married and financially stable and most importantly have a lot of love to share.

[tru3]

thanks again. new twist to this though, i am pregnant. so now i really have to work on myself so that i dont mess up an innocent baby. i will try my best to let go of all anger and negative emotions as i imagine they could negatively impact the baby growing inside of me. this is totally unexpected but i am married and financially stable and most importantly have a lot of love to share.

congratulations!!!!!!:D :D :D :D wow! you are truly blessed.

you are going to just bloom over the next year, i can tell. most people i've met in life rarely ever are willing to look and deal with their shadow. i've found that most times, it's the simple willingness that makes all the difference.

your baby is truly blessed to have such a courageous mother, too. :)

[i am all i am]

thanks again. new twist to this though, i am pregnant. so now i really have to work on myself so that i dont mess up an innocent baby. i will try my best to let go of all anger and negative emotions as i imagine they could negatively impact the baby growing inside of me. this is totally unexpected but i am married and financially stable and most importantly have a lot of love to share.

CONGRATULATIONS


With LOVE.

[llogun]

thanks for your posts all. it is a difficult thing to do to really look at my faults, but i am trying to evolve.

Every one as faults dont worry no one can judge you .By learning you will get better with your self and you will evolve

[mada88]

I don't believe that working on yourself is the first step its the only step! Things that are personal are the ways to envoke real change. If we just go around wasting loads of energy talking about the conspiracy people will never understand it. The reason people feel bad is because you feel for the fallen ones who are still asleep. Its all about changing the film in the projector room. And also its about facing your fears, because fear is the place you need to go.